Your New Boyfriend Wants to Buy My Farm? Well, That Ain’t Right!
Performed by Bale Harrison & The Texas Field Hands
Your New Boyfriend Wants to Buy My Farm? – Music and Lyrics by Alan Nafzger
(Verse 1)
I heard your new guy’s got some shiny shoes,
Thinks he can stroll in and do what I do.
He’s got soft hands, drives a slick SUV,
But honey, let’s admit, he ain’t cut out like me.
He says he’ll work this land and make it fine,
But he can’t tell a cow from a grape vine!
(Chorus)
Your new boyfriend wants to buy my farm? Well, that ain’t right!
He’s never milked a cow, let alone stayed the night,
In a barn full of critters, hay stacked high,
He thinks a tractor’s just a spot to sit and sigh.
You can take him to town, show off those tight jeans,
But don’t let him touch this land—he’s not built mean enough.
If he buys this place, it’ll be a sight,
But girl, you know deep down, that just ain’t right!
(Verse 2)
He’s got city strut, thinks he’s slick and smart,
Says he’ll “upgrade” my farm with a robot cart.
When the rooster crows, can he even tell the time?
Or will he hide in the house, glued to Amazon Prime?
He talks up organic, all fancy and fat,
But I’d bet my best boots he can’t catch that barn cat!
(Chorus)
Your new boyfriend wants to buy my farm? Well, that ain’t right!
He’s never shoveled mud in the dead of night,
Thinks pigs are cute, ‘til they gnaw on his hand,
He’s better off sipping lattes, not working this land!
Sure, he’s got the cash, but honey, here’s the deal—
He’ll swap your boots for diamond that ain’t real.
If he takes over, it’ll be quite a sight,
But girl, we both know, that just ain’t right!
(Bridge)
Now, don’t get me wrong, I wish you both the best,
But he’s scared of a rooster, you know the rest.
You need a man who knows corn from hay,
Not one who’s Googling “farming tips” all day!
(Chorus)
Your new boyfriend wants to buy my farm? Well, that ain’t right!
I bet he’s never fixed a fence by dawn’s first light,
Thinks hard work’s a treadmill with A/C,
But out here it’s sweat, mud, and being free!
Let him take you dancing, let him treat you fine,
But keep him off this soil—it’s still mine.
If he steps on my farm, he’ll get a surprise,
‘Cause darlin’, let’s face it—that just ain’t right!
(Outro)
So keep your new guy with his polished style,
But this farm ain’t for sale, not by a mile.
Tell him thanks but no thanks, and have a good night,
‘Cause honey, him buying this farm? Well, that just ain’t right!
No, girl, that just ain’t right!